22 Dec
Are You an Overachieving Caregiver?
Are You an Overachieving Caregiver?
(From the Alzheimer’s Sourcebook for Caregivers)
- Do you feel that no-one else can look after your relative as well as you can?
- Do you go for weeks without taking even an hour off?
- Would you feel you had abandoned your relative if you took him or her to a day respite program?
- Do you feel that only you can understand him or her and that letting others provide care would hurt, frighten or otherwise damage your relative?
- Do you feel anxious, exhausted or irritable most of the time?
- Do you secretly feel angry with your relative, and then feel deeply ashamed of your unnatural feelings and become obsessed by guilt?
- Have you dropped all your previous hobbies, friends and interests?
- Would you rather die than let your relative go into full-time professional care?
- Do you avoid going to support groups because you could never share your feelings with strangers, and/or you are sure such groups are full of people who just make each other miserable?
- Do you keep all your fears, needs and feelings to yourself because you aren’t the kind of person who shares such things with others?
- Are you sure that no good caregivers can be found?
More than two “yes’s” qualifies you for the overachieving caregiver club!
I am very happy to see that somebody came up with this idea.I would like to share the feelings with otter people who are taking care of their parents or relatives. I am caring for my mother and have full time job. If there is somebody who could share their experience I would be happy to hear from them.
January 6th, 2010 at 5:53 pmHello ‘Zuza’, thank you for your recent comment. We will be posting more articles on this subject. We will be specializing on helping you and others in same or similar situation with caregiver’s stress, burnout, meltdown etc. Keep coming back please. Our intentions are to be your source of information and support. We welcome all other caregivers to come and join ‘Zuza’ in discussions and suggestions. Don’t wait until you are at your wit’s end.
January 9th, 2010 at 2:23 pmBoomertoBoomerOnline.ca
Oh my gosh – you nailed me! It sounds so much worse when you make a list of it all. I am retired, taking care of my 99 yr old mother in my home (with my husband). Mom has dementia and is driving us quite nuts.
February 13th, 2010 at 5:10 pmDear 32dkid,
We are delighted you found us! Thanks so much for getting in touch and sharing your thoughts. Your comment made us to post our next topic, which is ‘A Caregiver’s Bill of Rights’. Please come back and visit us regularly. Sometimes it helps to know that your store of patience is not unlimited.
February 13th, 2010 at 5:55 pmMany of us see this for real when looking after aging parents.
You may described yourself as a patient person and find out what patience you have does not take you very far down the road. It takes time to replenish our patience. And that its most effective to have a plan to fall back on for this.
Think about what would work best for you and revert to it, whether you have time or not, when patience wears thin.
Decide what it is, a quiet cup of tea, a call to a friend, a walk outdoors, and commit yourself to practicing even when you feel you don’t have time.
Best regards,
Boomertobooneronline.ca